Virtual names for virtual people

It is the time of year when Geekman has to draft two new players into his virtual cricket team. As far as I can tell, virtual cricket is like Dungeons and Dragons for cricket geeks. He creates players with various stats, and some computer in Outer Mongolia pits his team against other people's, throwing die to determine who bowls, whether the batter hits and scores, and how many limbs each player breaks.

My father has a team too, and them playing against each other occasionally is pretty much the sum total of their father-in-law/son-in-law interaction.

Anyway, the cricket player names. He needs some.

To give you an idea of what sort of names his team members tend to have, here's the current list:

(You will see he went through a stage of naming them after language families, but he's kind of over that now. He also had a whole bunch named after his favourite foods, but they all died or retired.)

The Marauding Fluffies Cricket Team

Wafting Tentacle
Earl Grey
Tlingit
Ugric
Baffled Mollusc
Thingity
Mingrelian
Algonquian
Death Waffle
Zesti Dilemma
Doomed Lemming
Camomile Hoon
Favourite Onion
Nervous Fruitcake
Duplicitous
Inscrutable Frog
Cuddly Deathwish
Moterior Ultive

So what should the newbies be called? After all, we want them to fit in and not get laughed at by their fellow players.