Sunday, February 12, 2006

Grrr. Haircuts

Like ShrinkyKitten, I hate going to the hairdresser. At least I don't have to worry about how much to tip, seeing as most Australians would probably faint in shock if you tried to tip them. And the looking at myself with wet hair doesn't happen, because I can't see a thing once I take my glasses off. But every other moment of the process is filled with pure pain and loathing. Take, for example, my visit a few days ago.

"I'd just like a trim, please. I loved what you did last time and I'd like it cut back to the same length."
"Your colour is still looking pretty, dear."
"Yes, I don't need the colour redone today. It was only eight weeks ago that I was in here last. I made a New Year's resolution to get my hair cut regularly this year." I smile smugly.
"Yes. Well, I suppose you can cheat and get away with eight weeks between cuts now and then. You've got a lot of regrowth for only eight weeks, though".
"It really was exactly eight weeks ago," I reply, more defensively than I intend to. "My hair must grow fast. And I can't afford to get the colour redone this time round."
"Hmm... well maybe a good cut can hide it."
"I just want a trim. See how long the regrowth is? I want that much off."

Cut cut cut cut snip snip snip.

"How's that?"
"Um... Have you cut the back yet?"
"You did say you just wanted a trim, so I took off the smallest amount possible."
"Well, as you pointed out, the regrowth from last time is four or five centimetres, so I need about that much off to bring it back to how it was."
"Well, I suppose it's my fault, really. I should have asked you how much you wanted off. Hrmph."

Cut cut cut cut snip snip snip.

I put on my glasses again and look in the mirror. "Eeep!"
"I suppose it's too short now?"
"Erm. That's... fine. Thank you."

At the counter. "Shall I add another bottle of that nice shampoo to your bill?"
"No, thank you. I still have some left from the last lot I bought."
"But that was nearly a year ago!"
"Well as you said, I don't need to use very much..."
"If you say so."

Then, as always, she charges me a random amount of money that has no bearing on the price she quoted me when I made the appointment. It only varies by about $5 either way, and her prices are still way cheaper than anything I'd find off campus, so it's not worth making a fuss about. Especially since she always has a reason ready the times I have mentioned it. Nor are the random haircuts worth changing hairdresser for, since although she never gives me what I ask for, what she does do always ends up looking pretty anyway.

But GRRR! It always takes me about six hours after each visit before I calm down and stop grinding my teeth.

Oh, oh, and before I finish ranting, how about this?

On my first visit "...and I'd like a bit of layering around the back."
"Now dear, with hair as fine as yours, you should never get it layered. It will make it look like there's even less of it."

At the next visit, a few months down the track. "How about I give you a few layers to add a bit of volume?"


Clair said...

I have the problem in reverse...I love getting my hair cut. There is something so gorgeously self indulgent in having someone else wash your hair for you.

Shame that I'm never totally happy with the hair cut though.

Wez said...

I have to try to stay awake when I have my hair cut. Having my head messed with makes me drowsy.