Sunday, June 04, 2006

Some cameos from last night's rather surreal party

"Would you like a vitamin? They are very good."
"Vot do I do viz eet?"
"Chew it."
"Shoo eet?"
"Chew! Chew! It tastes like orange. Vitamins, anyone?"


"It's not fair that he's pulling all the chicks just because he's got a French accent. See that girl he's talking to now? I'm going to go sabotage his progress."


"Magst du seinen Schal?" [Do you like his scarf?]
"Ja. Ich habe auch irgendwie einen." [Yes. I sort of have one too.]

"So sweet. Now they have something in common."


"I'm just a goth who likes drinking beer. I'm going to be miserable at Berkeley."


"Do you want a lift home?"
"Yes, thanks, that'd be great."
"You live on campus, right?"
"Uh huh. In... um... hey!" [taps friend on shoulder] "What's the name of my college?" Then more desperately, "Does anyone know where I live?"


"Anyone else for vitamins?"
"You should haff vun. Zey are excellent. But you haff to shoo zem".


Badaunt said...

This reminds me of a New Year party I went to a few years ago during which a very mild and well-mannered British gentleman got spectacularly drunk. We lost him for a while, and when he turned up again he wanted to know where we'd gone, and were we teasing him? (We hadn't gone anywhere. He'd got lost coming back from the toilet.) Then we decided we'd better put him on the train home, but he couldn't remember where he lived (and had lived for the last 25 years).

The problem was, the drunker he got the more polite and agreeable he became, so he agreed with every suggestion we made.

"Where do you live?"

"Ooh! That's a good question. Do YOU know?" (Smiling agreeably, like it's going to be a nice surprise.)

"You take the Hankyu line, don't you?"

"Oh, well, I suppose I do, if you say so. I'm sure you're right."

"The RED train?"

"Red, are they? Hee hee!"

"Don't you live in Takarazuka? I remember you saying something about Takarazuka..."

"Did I? Oh, yeeeez. I probably did."

"Or was it Sanda?"

"Oh, Sanda! Maybe that's it. How clever of you!"

"Or Senri...?"

"Senri? Lovely place, Senri. Do you live there? How nice for you. Do I live there too?"

After some discussion we poured him onto a train which I suppose he got home eventually. I'm not sure how much later 'eventually' was, but when work started again he was there, as mild and polite as ever, and apparently unharmed.

StyleyGeek said...

I love your description of "pouring" him onto a train!